Happy New Year, friends! We are in the second year of the new decade! I’d love to share with you my year-in-review of 2020, as well as how I am feeling about this new year.
I know that 2020, like for most folks, was a difficult year in so many ways. I want to express gratitude for being alive and healthy because many folks cannot attest to the same state of being. My physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being vividly shifted each month. In a nutshell, my 2020 panned out to manifest in the following:
January, 2020: I was sitting on the sand at one of the beaches in Cabo, Mexico completely relaxed and in great serenity. I claimed this year to be ‘my year’ – a year of self-love, self-care, and self-awareness. I felt inspired, confident, and ready to take on this year that I manifested to be my glow-up year. Making my thoughts, feelings, and actions were going to always be my priority.
February, 2020: I underwent a great deal of lingering, unresolved hurt that forced me to make a difficult decision in order to healthily put myself first. Though removing toxicity in my life was difficult, it was very necessary for my own mental and emotional well-being. I learned how to establish boundaries for myself that helped me shed the ‘people-pleaser’ demeanor that I’ve traditionally presented in my social circles. Saying ‘no’ became an empowering word that I could now vocalize confidently.
March, 2020: The beginning of the month was a period of rebuilding myself emotionally and mentally. However, I was put into a sudden unrecognizable state of fear and uncertainty when life became everything other than ‘normal’ with the reality and frightening impacts of COVID-19 to my surrounding community and to the overall American population. The week before everything shut down, I was in Napa, California, uttering the at-the-time common belief that I was ‘invincible to the virus’ and that it was just like the flu (which a lot of people don’t realize can be deadly as well). Ooo, was I ignorant!
April, 2020: This continued fear, uncertainty, and paranoia plagued my mind, my social circles, and my overall community. However, I began to find some comfort in knowing that I was not isolated in my fears and sadness regarding the pandemic.
May, 2020: I slowly adapted to redefining ‘normalcy’ in my life given the circumstances that the pandemic allowed me to. I also began to see people on my social media expose themselves left and right in regards to if they truly thought that All Black Lives truly do matter. I saw a LOT of performative allyship, which felt like a mockery of my Blackness.
June, 2020: I felt more immense hurt, anger, brokenness, hopelessness, and a lack of safety and security as a Black person in this country. I also learned the vitality of conserving and protecting my energy during this month.
July, 2020: I had a deep talk with God and looked within myself to realign my priorities and redefine my goals and ambitions. Eliminating distractions was necessary, especially since I was shifting into a new chapter of my life that would require focus, dedication, and faith to succeed. I worked on becoming remotivated to rechannel my January state of mind.
August, 2020: Nervousness and self-doubt crept in as pivotal life realizations became more apparent each day.
September, 2020: I rebuked the spirit of self-doubt and exchanged it with increased self-confidence and optimism.
October, 2020: A disciplined mindset shift for myself resulted in finally seeing some personal accomplishments come into fruition.
November, 2020: Feelings of burnout and stagnancy began to manifest. I began yearning for the next big move in my life.
December, 2020: Though still dealing with some burnout, I became reinspired, reawakened, and most importantly grateful that I made it to the end of the year.
Overall, I have grown and developed in so many ways that I did not anticipate in 2020. I feel that I have redefined purpose and have tapped into other callings shown to me. At the beginning of the year, I scribed in my passion planner some of my most important personal goals that I had for my immediate future. I didn’t know at the time whether or not I would achieve them in 6 months, 1 year, or 3 years (as it is laid out in the planner). However, I want to highlight a few of the most important goals that I’m happy I was able to achieve:
- Traveling abroad again
- Getting into occupational therapy school
- Paying off the entirety of my college student loans
- Exploring photography more
- Connecting with folks and building relationships beyond my spheres of influence
Now, for the year 2021, I don’t necessarily feel as if I have any concrete “New Year’s Resolutions.” Sure, I aim to survive and hopefully thrive in OT school, continue to save money, and exercise more. However, I am actually focused on claiming words and attitudes that I hope to embody and exemplify in all that I do. I project that for 2021, my words will be the following: intentionality, purpose, and self-elevation.
I aim to be intentional in my relationships and my actions, purposeful in the way that I use my energy and how I navigate my surrounding community, and elevate myself by continuing to discover and utilize my multiple passions, talents, and gifts.
I anticipate 2021 being a year of change specifically for me, for I will be going through a LOT of new life changes. However, I believe that being intentional, purposeful, and elevating myself consistently will keep me grounded during these changes.
With all being said, I hope that y’all claim, manifest, and speak into existence blessings for your new year as well. ✨
Peace and love,